AHHHH

Hello! 

I get your emails. I love and always look forward to them! 

I am not going to lie I have been struggling with my companion. I have never struggled this bad with a companion before but she drives me nuts!!! I am trying to be a good example for the other sisters and I have been trying to work really hard to love her. My companion struggles with anxiety and recently she has been trying to figure stuff out with her medication and different coping strategies so she has been to the doctor a couple times since I have been here. She is so uptight and she constantly challenges me and questions every decision I make. She always tries to control things herself and acts like I don't know what I am doing. She even corrects my driving! We had to cancel an exchange this week because she had an anxiety attack. I have been getting a lot of head aches recently because of how much this is pushing me. Her anxiety increases when things aren't exactly perfect. pretty soon I am going to have anxiety.

I just want you to know that I am not a disobedient missionary. I am really really trying hard to be patient and do my best. I keep trying to remind myself that it is her anxiety. She really is a good missionary.  

Last week we had to split up some sisters in our zone because they weren't getting along. It has just been so stressful. I have been studying about the Spirit a lot. Ever since Elder Rasband came I can't stop thinking about the spirit and how the spirit works. Scripture study is relief right now. personal studies recently have been so strengthening and have been my peace. I want so badly to have the spirit with me and I know when there is contention and no companion unity it is hard to work and teach with the spirit. I am trying to master the natural man and yield to the enticings of the Holy Ghost. Have virtuous thoughts and develop Christ like attributes but I am sadly not perfect. I am just trying to endure well to the end. I don't know what I will do if I have to endure my last transfer with her.

We had president interviews a couple weeks ago and we mostly talked about the other sisters but we had some time to talk about how I am doing. I told him that "for the most part we get along but sometimes it's like...ahhh!" He just laughed. I must not have been the only missionary who has felt like that. I asked him what I can do to be a better STL and he told me to be a happy missionary and serve Sister Schow. So simple but so hard!!!! She makes me want to go home so bad. 

I am sorry I have been whining a lot and I know I have complained about other things in my mission but It is nice to just rant sometimes. I don't expect you to have the perfect answer. I just am grateful for the emails and love. 

But on a more happier note, the members here are awesome. We have been able to go out with some young women. We have been working a lot with members of the ward council and they have been really great at helping us with the less actives so we have lots to do. The sisters in my zones are doing a lot better and are getting along and are finding lots of success. It is like how Alma said in Alma chapter 29 how he finds great joy in the success of his brethren. I have definitely felt that joy. I have loved going on exchanges with the other sisters. they are so awesome :) 

I love you all. I love Jesus. I love Pres. Monson. I love the scriptures. I love... lamp haha 

Have a great week!!! 

LOVE Sister Fisher 

PIC: Exchanges with the parkway2 sisters!!